Formerly known as "I'm a Hoe" but times and people change. It was a fun and productive metaphor that I enjoyed extending too far. Now it is done. The tool shed is retired, but the vicious momma is still here. I will be making adjustments to this blog as time allows.
Saturday, June 11, 2005
Hoe of the Weekend
Congratulations to madman for becoming the Hoe of the Weekend! You crack me up, man!
In regard to what you said on my blog, i have this reply because i do not know if you will come back to see what i wrote. i fully expect you will delete this when you've read it,but at least you will have read it. Hopefully, it will help explain why my life is right for me.
i have been meditating lately, to understand myself better. What has come up has been situations that make me angry. Feelings of being taken for granted and left to do all the work. Feelings of not being valued by those around me. All these things are just reflections of self, so what I'm really seeing is my low opinion of myself. My undervaluing my ownself and time. That makes a lot of sense to me.
Someone posted a comment about this, i think they think this is s sign that i am in the wrong relationship, that someone my being a slave is not really all that right for me, that i need to get out of this situation and live my life more "authentically". i want to address that point in full here, specifically to the person who made the comment but to anyone else who may have drawn that conclusion.
Not everyone is meant to have a "normal" relationship. Not everyone is the same. To people who strive for automomy and some level of control in their relationships, they see what i do as running away, as deluding myself, as giving up control. They cannnot possibly understand what this is like for me, but cause it would never be right for them in a million years. It is simply not who they are. This is who I AM though.
At no time have i ever felt that Master was taking advantage of me, or neglecting me. He is the most precious person in the world to me. He has never once taken advantage of me. Never once neglected me, or treated me with anything than other respect. Yes, He has spanked me. Yes, He has asked me to do things that some would find degrading, but that is what works for U/us. That is what is 'right' about this relationship, right for U/us.
Since being with Master, i have found the strength to believe in myself as a person, a woman and as a slave. i have gotten my life together. i have taken control of areas that normally i avoid out of fear. i am back on track with my 'life plan'. i have said consistently that this man and i are soul mates - are meant-to-be mates. He excites me, stretches me, challenges me, loves me, tenderly caresses and kisses me. When with Him i feel alive as i never have before with anyone else.
i have gone through a massive growth experience in the last few months. Many life long patterns are being changed and this man is the catalist. It is because He came into my life that i feel i have the strength to be the person i am meant to be.
Tell me, with all of this, how could this relationship possibly be wrong?
What W/we have is what many strive for but few find. W/we have a relationship that is strongly grounded in love, friendship and mutual respect. W/we honour each other as a person as a man-woman and as a Master-slave. W/we care for each other when sick. W/we listen to each other when unhappy or excited or nervous. W/we have shared deep seated fears with each other and only found love and acceptance from the other. W/we have both dared to grow and evolve into the people W/we are meant to be, to seek new endeavours, to have the strength to face obsticles and survive.
When an issue or concern faces one of U/us W/we sit down and talk with the other. Simple. W/we both espouse the idea of attentive listening, of active acceptance of what the other has to say.
The fundamentles of what W/we have together are the way it _should_ be for everyone, vanilla or not. How W/we express O/our unique relationship is O/our business. i'm simply sharing it hear so that others may feel that what they have is not wrong, or may discover who they are, or may simply come to understand better something that they could never do. It is also an open love letter to Master, to tell Him all the things i feel i can not say face to face at times. Not because He won't listen or accept. Not because He will get angry and punish, but because i feel embarrassed to raise them. Because it is MY issue not His.
To address what i get out of being a slave. i _need_ to be made to do things sexually, be made to fuck strangers, be made to crawl around naked and beg for a cock to suck in front of just Master or as many people as He chooses. i need to be tied down and taken by many at once. i need to be slapped across the face and told i'm a slut, a common whore. i need to be told to drive down the road with no top on. i need to be told i cannot sit on furniture without permission and made to sit on the floor when guests come over.
i need to feel that He is in control, that He is in charge of me, that He can 'force' me to do what He wants, that if i do not i will be punished.
I NEED THIS. Why? because quite frankly, it rocks my boat. Its the only thing that gets me wet. Having someone sit there and whisper sweet nothings in my ear and treat me like a lady does NOTHING for me. Having someone sit there and whisper sweet nothings in my ear, then turn around and bite the ear, the neck, the nipple and anywhere else does. Its that simple.
And to answer another point. No slavery is NOT WRONG when it is voluntary.. Wrong for you maybe but not for me.
m.chained - (had to comment) sounds to me like you have very low self esteem ~ and don't feel like you DESERVE to be treated like a lady, thus the mind block. I'm all for love play- but you sound unhealthy. Anytime love play becomes a neccessity of, not an addition to, your sex life- it's unhealthy.
Dear chained, my comment on your blog was purely my following the guidance of my spiritual convictions, perhaps planting a small seed of something for you look for later. I wasn't trying to tell you that you CAN'T live the way you do but that at the most fundamental levels it is wrong for anyone to live in slavery. We had a civil war over it here in the US. I'm no religious right-winger either. This has nothing to do with religion but everything to do with basic human rights. You do have the right to live the life you think makes you happy, but be prepared for others to state their opinions on your blog. In these public forums we are here to communicate. I welcome your comments here even if we do disagree. I wish you good luck, health, and happiness.
That was quite an exchange. Went to MIchelle's site...very interesting. Not for me, but as I said before, I'm a "Live and Let Live" kind of person...as you seem to be too Rae Ann. That's one of the cool things about this whole blogging thing...the different perspectives you get exposed to. I maybe feel a new topic coming on...C YA.
Yeah, Mr. G, I am usually a live and let live person, but sometimes I feel/sense/intuit a spiritual need in someone and I'm learning not to ignore that. Perhaps I'm totally in the wrong to question the validity of someone's ideals/ideas or whatever. (I'm having a little trouble putting my thoughts into words here.) Basically, I think her living like that is about the same as the "Christian Scientists" or whatever church it is that doesn't allow people to go to doctors. I think we should call Amnesty International to help her out, don't you?
I am prepared to have people comment on my blog. That is why the option for peole to post comments is left as yes.
With regard to my doing what I like with my life, um, yes, thats right it is my life. No I do not need AI to assist me in anyway, and basically would they?? I mean I'm not a political prisoner now, am I?
To gina..
I have the STRENGTH to take a good look at myself to see what my strenths and weaknesses are: what my needs are. I have the COURAGE to then seek out experiences that fit my needs. I have the FORTITUDE to live my life by MY needs - MY AUTHENTICITY. I have the HUMILITY to look at a world that won't understand or accept that is this me. That I never will be "like them".
People look at my life and make all sorts of judgements about how right or wrong it is based on THEIR needs, experience, understanding. Yet,that simply means it is right or wrong FOR THEM.
I have the STRENGTH, COURAGE, FORTITUDE to live my life in a way that makes me HAPPY & FULFILLED - even when all of society would tell me I'm wrong. I would say I have quite high self-esteem. Can you say the same?
Are you sure the Civil War was about slavery? From my understanding of American history, the Civil war was about economics and politics. The econimc system in the South was based on Slave labour. The North wanted to follow the industrial trend of Europe and the South did not want to, thus war enshued. The slavery angle was simply an added on cause.
The Amnesty comment was a joke about my own taking things too seriously. Sorry you didn't catch that. I do have an odd sense of humor. You are correct about the issues of the civil war being more than just slavery. As I learned it, the big issue was States' rights as opposed to Federal rights. But at its most basic the slavery was the gist of the conflict. Perhaps I have so much trouble understanding your way of thinking because I'd be more inclined to be a dominatrix. However, it wouldn't define me.
9 comments:
In regard to what you said on my blog, i have this reply because i do not know if you will come back to see what i wrote. i fully expect you will delete this when you've read it,but at least you will have read it. Hopefully, it will help explain why my life is right for me.
i have been meditating lately, to understand myself better. What has come up has been situations that make me angry. Feelings of being taken for granted and left to do all the work. Feelings of not being valued by those around me. All these things are just reflections of self, so what I'm really seeing is my low opinion of myself. My undervaluing my ownself and time. That makes a lot of sense to me.
Someone posted a comment about this, i think they think this is s sign that i am in the wrong relationship, that someone my being a slave is not really all that right for me, that i need to get out of this situation and live my life more "authentically". i want to address that point in full here, specifically to the person who made the comment but to anyone else who may have drawn that conclusion.
Not everyone is meant to have a "normal" relationship. Not everyone is the same. To people who strive for automomy and some level of control in their relationships, they see what i do as running away, as deluding myself, as giving up control. They cannnot possibly understand what this is like for me, but cause it would never be right for them in a million years. It is simply not who they are. This is who I AM though.
At no time have i ever felt that Master was taking advantage of me, or neglecting me. He is the most precious person in the world to me. He has never once taken advantage of me. Never once neglected me, or treated me with anything than other respect. Yes, He has spanked me. Yes, He has asked me to do things that some would find degrading, but that is what works for U/us. That is what is 'right' about this relationship, right for U/us.
Since being with Master, i have found the strength to believe in myself as a person, a woman and as a slave. i have gotten my life together. i have taken control of areas that normally i avoid out of fear. i am back on track with my 'life plan'. i have said consistently that this man and i are soul mates - are meant-to-be mates. He excites me, stretches me, challenges me, loves me, tenderly caresses and kisses me. When with Him i feel alive as i never have before with anyone else.
i have gone through a massive growth experience in the last few months. Many life long patterns are being changed and this man is the catalist. It is because He came into my life that i feel i have the strength to be the person i am meant to be.
Tell me, with all of this, how could this relationship possibly be wrong?
What W/we have is what many strive for but few find. W/we have a relationship that is strongly grounded in love, friendship and mutual respect. W/we honour each other as a person as a man-woman and as a Master-slave. W/we care for each other when sick. W/we listen to each other when unhappy or excited or nervous. W/we have shared deep seated fears with each other and only found love and acceptance from the other. W/we have both dared to grow and evolve into the people W/we are meant to be, to seek new endeavours, to have the strength to face obsticles and survive.
When an issue or concern faces one of U/us W/we sit down and talk with the other. Simple. W/we both espouse the idea of attentive listening, of active acceptance of what the other has to say.
The fundamentles of what W/we have together are the way it _should_ be for everyone, vanilla or not. How W/we express O/our unique relationship is O/our business. i'm simply sharing it hear so that others may feel that what they have is not wrong, or may discover who they are, or may simply come to understand better something that they could never do. It is also an open love letter to Master, to tell Him all the things i feel i can not say face to face at times. Not because He won't listen or accept. Not because He will get angry and punish, but because i feel embarrassed to raise them. Because it is MY issue not His.
To address what i get out of being a slave. i _need_ to be made to do things sexually, be made to fuck strangers, be made to crawl around naked and beg for a cock to suck in front of just Master or as many people as He chooses. i need to be tied down and taken by many at once. i need to be slapped across the face and told i'm a slut, a common whore. i need to be told to drive down the road with no top on. i need to be told i cannot sit on furniture without permission and made to sit on the floor when guests come over.
i need to feel that He is in control, that He is in charge of me, that He can 'force' me to do what He wants, that if i do not i will be punished.
I NEED THIS. Why? because quite frankly, it rocks my boat. Its the only thing that gets me wet. Having someone sit there and whisper sweet nothings in my ear and treat me like a lady does NOTHING for me. Having someone sit there and whisper sweet nothings in my ear, then turn around and bite the ear, the neck, the nipple and anywhere else does. Its that simple.
And to answer another point. No slavery is NOT WRONG when it is voluntary.. Wrong for you maybe but not for me.
m.chained - (had to comment)
sounds to me like you have very low self esteem ~ and don't feel like you DESERVE to be treated like a lady, thus the mind block. I'm all for love play- but you sound unhealthy. Anytime love play becomes a neccessity of, not an addition to, your sex life- it's unhealthy.
Dear chained, my comment on your blog was purely my following the guidance of my spiritual convictions, perhaps planting a small seed of something for you look for later. I wasn't trying to tell you that you CAN'T live the way you do but that at the most fundamental levels it is wrong for anyone to live in slavery. We had a civil war over it here in the US. I'm no religious right-winger either. This has nothing to do with religion but everything to do with basic human rights. You do have the right to live the life you think makes you happy, but be prepared for others to state their opinions on your blog. In these public forums we are here to communicate. I welcome your comments here even if we do disagree. I wish you good luck, health, and happiness.
That was quite an exchange. Went to MIchelle's site...very interesting. Not for me, but as I said before, I'm a "Live and Let Live" kind of person...as you seem to be too Rae Ann. That's one of the cool things about this whole blogging thing...the different perspectives you get exposed to. I maybe feel a new topic coming on...C YA.
Yeah, Mr. G, I am usually a live and let live person, but sometimes I feel/sense/intuit a spiritual need in someone and I'm learning not to ignore that. Perhaps I'm totally in the wrong to question the validity of someone's ideals/ideas or whatever. (I'm having a little trouble putting my thoughts into words here.) Basically, I think her living like that is about the same as the "Christian Scientists" or whatever church it is that doesn't allow people to go to doctors. I think we should call Amnesty International to help her out, don't you?
Yes indeed, madman, that IS the most important thing! Thank you for getting us all back on track. LOL
rae_ann,
I am prepared to have people comment on my blog. That is why the option for peole to post comments is left as yes.
With regard to my doing what I like with my life, um, yes, thats right it is my life. No I do not need AI to assist me in anyway, and basically would they?? I mean I'm not a political prisoner now, am I?
To gina..
I have the STRENGTH to take a good look at myself to see what my strenths and weaknesses are: what my needs are.
I have the COURAGE to then seek out experiences that fit my needs.
I have the FORTITUDE to live my life by MY needs - MY AUTHENTICITY.
I have the HUMILITY to look at a world that won't understand or accept that is this me. That I never will be "like them".
People look at my life and make all sorts of judgements about how right or wrong it is based on THEIR needs, experience, understanding. Yet,that simply means it is right or wrong FOR THEM.
I have the STRENGTH, COURAGE, FORTITUDE to live my life in a way that makes me HAPPY & FULFILLED - even when all of society would tell me I'm wrong. I would say I have quite high self-esteem. Can you say the same?
Are you sure the Civil War was about slavery? From my understanding of American history, the Civil war was about economics and politics. The econimc system in the South was based on Slave labour. The North wanted to follow the industrial trend of Europe and the South did not want to, thus war enshued. The slavery angle was simply an added on cause.
The Amnesty comment was a joke about my own taking things too seriously. Sorry you didn't catch that. I do have an odd sense of humor. You are correct about the issues of the civil war being more than just slavery. As I learned it, the big issue was States' rights as opposed to Federal rights. But at its most basic the slavery was the gist of the conflict. Perhaps I have so much trouble understanding your way of thinking because I'd be more inclined to be a dominatrix. However, it wouldn't define me.
One more thing. I don't have to be humiliated to get wet. All I have to do is think about a beautiful man being near me.
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