Typealyzer Blog Personality

via Backreaction

Typealyzer says it can guess the personality of a text, or communication style, but does note that "writing style on a blog may have little or nothing to do with a person´s self-percieved personality." According to their calculations I'm a Hoe (as well as all of my other blogs - public and private) is this:

ISTP - The Mechanics

The independent and problem-solving type. They are especially attuned to the demands of the moment are masters of responding to challenges that arise spontaneously. They generally prefer to think things out for themselves and often avoid inter-personal conflicts.



The Mechanics enjoy working together with other independent and highly skilled people and often like [to] seek fun and action both in their work and personal life. They enjoy adventure and risk such as in driving race cars or working as policemen and firefighters.

Analysis

This show what parts of the brain that were dominant during writing.



Add to that the gender analysis of this blog from GenderAnalyzer that says:

We think http://viciousmomma.blogspot.com is written by a man (87%).

And it appears that by some kind of "statistical analyses" I should be a male, but I am most definitely a woman, at least my body that produced three children is female. :-)

I suppose that despite being a "vicious momma" my being a "hoe" which is a type of tool does fit the mechanic theme. And since most mechanics are males that use tools then these results make some kind of sense.

Being labeled as a Mechanic might also be related to my fixing things. And the description about liking adventure and fast cars fits well too. Though I've never had any desire to be a cop or fireman I do sometimes fantasize about being a super-hero vigilante. ;-) That goes along with the problem solving combined with the liking action and adventure, don't you think?

But in other personality tests I've been INFJ or "Counselor" type. Maybe in my writing I am much more analytical while in my in-person relations I am much more empathetic and "fuzzy". ;-) However, I can see some congruity of these different personality results. Probably the same active problem-solving tendency occurs whether I'm dealing with things or people.

Elvis Born 73 Years Ago

Elvis Presley was born 73 years ago today. Unfortunately, he died more than 30 years ago. The flashy jump-suited Elvis of this video was always my favorite, but it's too bad that it doesn't show enough of his famous pelvis thrusting. I do recall watching this "Live Aloha From Hawaii" concert on TV with my parents when I was almost five.




In 1993, after my mom's first liver cancer surgery, I took her to Graceland in Memphis.

Elvis was a hoe for sure. I shall now officially induct him into the Hoe Hall of Fame. ;-)

Electric Hoe

Black and Decker has made a cordless electric hoe (cultivator).

I suppose now all of us old-fashioned types are really becoming obsolete. Well, lately it appears to be a real trend since my husband also seems to wish I was newer and more electrically charged. Maybe I should buy him this vibrating hoe for his birthday in a few days. ;-)

Prostitute Killed In Hoe Attack

(via Tayster)


Wow, the world really must be about to end. A hoe has been implicated in the murder of a transvestite prostitute in California.

I have to say that hoes are just not well-suited for violence and especially not murder. What a mess it must have been! Yuck!

I think that hoe must have been part pitch fork or something. Most hoes are quite peaceful and kind. This is such shocking news.

Two Years

Wow, I've been a blogging hoe for two years now. With just under 700 posts in all, that is a lot of blather and fun. Is it an anniversary or a birthday? I don't know, and I guess it doesn't really matter anyway. Not that anyone's gonna buy me a cake or any other token of congratulations. I almost forgot it myself since I've been so busy this week with three school fieldtrips on top of all the other usual stuff.

Well, I haven't been a very good blogger lately, and my little blog isn't really very important in the grand scheme of things. But I never started blogging to become famous or infamous or whatever. It has mainly been for my own entertainment and a "creative" outlet. I'm happy that a few other people have enjoyed it as well. Thanks so much to the few who actually read it! ;-) And even more thanks to those even fewer who actually comment!! :-)

(According to my statcounter, only about 15% of hits are returning visitors while the others are mostly Googlers. Those numbers don't include readers who use feed-readers - like Bloglines, Google Reader, etc. - instead of visiting the actual blog, and I really don't know if there are any of that variety in the first place.)


A gift from Nature: the water irises I "planted" last year are blooming now.

De-motivation

Make your own "motivational" poster.

More About Anna Nicole

I feel especially sorry for her little baby. All of these people fighting over her possible inheritance, but they don't really care about her. This poor child will probably never have a normal life, and that is the biggest tragedy of the whole situation.

Despite whatever some people might say about Anna Nicole and her (bad) choices in life, I do kinda feel sorry for her because nearly everyone around her was only using her. She had spoken of feeling "alone" in the world in some interviews, and I think that she felt that way because on a certain level she knew that most of the people in her life were there for the fame and fortune and not because they genuinely liked and cared for her. I can't really say about Howard K. Stern. I think he probably always loved her but that she couldn't fully trust that anyone's feelings for her were true and genuine. That would most definitely cause one to feel "alone" in the world even though she is surrounded by many people.

Normally, I generally agree with Bill O-Reilly, but he has been quite harsh in regards to Anna Nicole's death. Well, maybe she was a little dumb about her choices in life, but I don't think that's a good reason to scorn her. Who among us has never made a bad choice? Or even several bad choices? And why ridicule someone for not being especially "smart" when her "dumbness" has made her rich and famous? Well, of course, we're all entitled to our own opinions.

I hereby formally and posthumously induct Anna Nicole Smith into the Hoe Hall of Fame. She was a Hoe as much as her idol, Marilyn Monroe. Well, some might object and say that Marilyn had more class, etc., but I think that is an unfair statement because if Marilyn had lived in our current crazy media culture, she would have been ridiculed for the same things as Anna Nicole, or even worse since as far as we know Anna Nicole wasn't sleeping with a President and his brother.

The parallels between Anna Nicole's and Marilyn's lives and deaths are striking, and perhaps that was by Anna Nicole's design, though it could be argued that Anna Nicole's life was even more difficult and tragic. While Marilyn endured many failed marriages and at least one miscarriage, she was never a mother and never suffered the loss of a child, which is any mother's worst nightmare. Both women were used and thrown away by people who claimed to love her.

And while I'm preaching a little, let me add that Anna Nicole's tragic life can be seen as evidence that Hugh Hefner truly is the Devil. Let us not forget that Hefner and Playboy are also a common and primary thread in the stories of Anna Nicole Smith and Marilyn Monroe. When you extend his philosophy of women to its logical conclusion you will find yourself staring at the dead bodies of Anna Nicole and Marilyn Monroe.

In conclusion, I'd just like to say that despite all the hoopla about her life and death, we must remember that Anna Nicole Smith was a human being with real feelings and needs and challenges. None of us should feel superior because we don't really know how hard it was for her to live with what life gave her.

Do not judge so that you will not be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

Matthew 7: 1-5

Afterthought: I do realize that by judging Hefner so harshly I am guilty of a bit of hypocrisy about not judging others, but sorry, I stand by my evaluation of his Devilness.

Another afterthought: I had meant to mention that I had no opinion about Anna Nicole until I started watching her "reality" show when I was laid up in bed and tethered to a catheter for two weeks after my hysterectomy. I had to have the catheter because my insides were all messed up from the c-sections and they had to cut my bladder to get the other stuff out. That was about as non-graphic a description as I could think of so sorry if it was still gross. Anyway, her show was a fun distraction from my own troubles and for that I am/was thankful. And I could say that it helped my recovery as it forced me to laugh and therefore exercise my wounded abdomen. And laughing was better than making myself cough as the doctors had instructed.

Happy Hoe New Year!

Thanks to reader, Rafa, from Madrid, Spain, for alerting me to this Hoe poem and Hoe painting.

The Man with a Hoe

Bowed by the weight of centuries he leans
Upon his hoe and gazes on the ground,
The emptiness of ages in his face,
And on his back, the burden of the world.
Who made him dead to rapture and despair,
A thing that grieves not and that never hopes,
Stolid and stunned, a brother to the ox?
Who loosened and let down this brutal jaw?
Whose was the hand that slanted back this brow?
Whose breath blew out the light within this brain?

Is this the Thing the Lord God made and gave
To have dominion over sea and land;
To trace the stars and search the heavens for power;
To feel the passion of Eternity?
Is this the dream He dreamed who shaped the suns
And marked their ways upon the ancient deep?
Down all the caverns of Hell to their last gulf
There is no shape more terrible than this--
More tongued with cries against the world's blind greed--
More filled with signs and portents for the soul--
More packed with danger to the universe.

What gulfs between him and the seraphim!
Slave of the wheel of labor, what to him
Are Plato and the swing of the Pleiades?
What the long reaches of the peaks of song,
The rift of dawn, the reddening of the rose?
Through this dread shape the suffering ages look;
Time's tragedy is in that aching stoop;
Through this dread shape humanity betrayed,
Plundered, profaned and disinherited,
Cries protest to the Powers that made the world,
A protest that is also prophecy.

O masters, lords and rulers in all lands,
Is this the handiwork you give to God,
This monstrous thing distorted and soul-quenched?
How will you ever straighten up this shape;
Touch it again with immortality;
Give back the upward looking and the light;
Rebuild in it the music and the dream;
Make right the immemorial infamies,
Perfidious wrongs, immedicable woes?

O masters, lords and rulers in all lands,
How will the future reckon with this Man?
How answer his brute question in that hour
When whirlwinds of rebellion shake all shores?
How will it be with kingdoms and with kings--
With those who shaped him to the thing he is--
When this dumb Terror shall rise to judge the world,
After the silence of the centuries?

1899, Charles Edward Anson Markham (1852-1940)
Using the penname Edwin Markham

Markham was inspired by the 1863 painting "L'homme à la houe" by the French artist, Jean-François Millet (1814-1875), to write this poem.




If you think that guy is worn and tired, just imagine how his poor hoe must feel! ;-) Actually, I think he'd have saved his back some trouble with a longer handle on his hoe, but I guess back then they made do with what they could find.

Incidentally, this morning I watched part of a documentary about Afghanistan and was enlightened to see that even when people live in caves they have the same concerns and conflicts within their families as people who live in warm, comfortable houses. The wife was bitching at the husband about the same things I bitch about sometimes, and the older man was bitching at the younger man (not sure if the wife was this older guy's daughter) about going out and getting a job to help support the family. It is very weird to know that in the twenty-first century there are people still living in caves. It is another moment of realization at how good my life is and how thankful and appreciative I must be.

As we begin 2007 let's all reflect on the blessings we've received and be truly thankful for them. And let's hope that the New Year will continue to provide for us the things we need. And also, let's have compassion and empathy for those whose work is greater than ours and whose lives are harder.

Happy New Year!

PS I did ring in the New Year with a glass of premature lemonade, and it was pretty tasty!

Hoe Hall of Fame: New Inductee

(make your own sign)



I am officially inducting Richard Feynman into the Hoe Hall of Fame. He joins the distinguished group which includes Mae West, Marilyn Monroe, and John F. Kennedy. Congratulations Richard Feynman!

Blast from the Past

For whatever narcissistic or egotistic reason I went back to the beginning of my blog and reread some of those first posts. I was doing pretty well at staying with the Hoe theme, but I guess I lost it somewhere along the way. Here's a repeat from May 9, 2005:



%@&#!!! Pitch Forks


In case anyone is wondering why Pitch Forks are so bad I guess I should fill you in. It goes way back to an old tool shed feud between the Pitch Fork and Hoe families. And of course it originated with accusations of cheating and illegitimate hybrids. Now, all of this happened long before these kinds of conflicts were played out on Jerry Springer's stage. But if there had been a Jerry Springer back then you can be sure that the old P.F.s and Hoes would have been on there hootin' and hollerin' and dukin' it out to the cheers of an audience of wayward lawn and garden tools. I can't really go into great detail because the feud was finally settled in court and there was a clause that all descendents of each family must not discuss certain details. I know that spoils it for all the voyeurs out there, but I don't really want to get into trouble for running my mouth too much. But let's just say that an old Pitch Fork was living up to his family's heritage.

Let's talk about Pitch Forks in history. They are bad news. They always have been. How do you think the Devil ended up picking a Pitch Fork for his tool of choice? That was a match made in Hell, that's for sure. And how many stories have you heard about some unsuspecting kid jumping into a haystack where a Pitch Fork was hiding? Lots, I know. And the poor kids always ended up impaled by the nasty Pitch Fork. Most of them died because of it. You've never heard any tales about Hoes killing kids like that. It just doesn't happen. Hoes generally stay out of haystacks to begin with. We don't like that texture of straw, and it's really messy too, which brings me to the jobs that Pitch Forks usually do. They really aren't good for much except moving hay around. That's about it. Honestly, and this isn't slander, it's the truth; Pitch Forks just aren't very useful. I think that's the root of their evil. They have such low self esteem about that it makes them mean. We all know that type.

Okay so that's a little background on that whole evil Pitch Fork thing. I'm sure I'll think of some other bad things they've been responsible for over the years, but that's enough for now. Just mark my words. Beware the evil Pitch Forks. They might appear harmless or at least non-threatening, but just remember, Pitch Forks are very dangerous.


I should change my listing of 'Bad Seeds and Noxious Weeds' to include Pitchforks. I had forgotten my distaste for them until last night when we went shopping for Halloween costumes. My daughter and I decided to be matching devils. She'll be my Mini-Me. We both got small, red, plastic (a plastic pitch fork is about as useful as any other), glittery pitch forks to go with our costumes. Too bad they don't make glittery hoes too. I'd so have to have one.

Hurting Hoe

I'm going to the Hoe doctor this afternoon at 3:30. We'll see just how much of a hypochondriac I am or if I've missed my calling as a diagnostician (that is a word, I looked it up to make sure I didn't make it up). I just got back from taking my oldest Hoe-ling to the doctor to make sure his pneumonia was all cleared up. Yeah, I have three little Hoe-lings, and no, we usually aren't so sickly.

Sometimes my overactive little Hoe brain gets carried away and imagines some wild things. I'm currently entertaining the thoughts that I might be married to a Pitch Fork in disguise. I tried to do the Quiz giving the answers I thought the Mister would choose, but the result was a Guitar and that just didn't really seem to fit him. I guess it doesn't work unless you do your own quiz. I can't really elaborate at this time about the source of my suspicions about this man I've been married to for 14 years. You can be certain that if I'm right you'll be hearing about it. But if nothing more is said then it means that I was engaging in foolish speculations.

I do have a high tolerance for pain. That doesn't mean that I'm happy to hurt and that I don't complain. But it does mean that the pain that would put someone else in bed doped up with pain killers just makes me really grouchy as I go about my usual business. Such is life as a Hoe. So since I'm hurting pretty bad right now I'm a bit grouchy. Please accept my apologies for that.

Hoe of the Day

Today's honor goes to Hall who is one of the best writers I've had the pleasure of reading. His blog is one of those treasures waiting to be found. So click and read, people, because it's that good. Congratulations Hall!


update, 12-31-06: Well, isn't this a humorous little coincidence? When this post was first published the linked blog was by some guy who was a runner and an excellent writer, but he disappeared soon after being nominated Hoe of the Day. I don't think the two were at all related. ;-) Well, now the linked blog is Cat Pictures Gallery. I think it's mostly one of those blogs set up just to make money off the ads and stuff, but it does have some really cute kitten pictures. ;-) I totally SWEAR on the Bible that I did not know about this before right now. You do have to admit that it's a pretty funny random connection.


(I should restart the Hoe of the Day or at least Hoe of the Week in the New Year.)

Evil Hoe!

I have a little evil streak in me. I suspect that there was a pitch fork somewhere in my lineage. You know, none of us are 'pure' anything, not even the so-called royals in England. Anyway, thanks to devilboss I have found the perfect air freshener for my car. I have got to have these:

Hell-O Satan (need one for each car)

Hell-O Satan stash box (for the stash, of course)

Jesus Ashtray (nice companion to the stash box)



And even though she didn't ask, I do believe that I will bestow upon devilboss today's honor of Hoe of the Day. Congratulations, devilboss!! And thank you for introducing me to the wonderfully evil products featured above. Sometimes I just have to indulge that little evil Hoe inside me....

Speaking of movies...

This weekend I just watched the movie Mystery Men. It was on my long list of want-to-see movies. I don't get to the cinema very often to see things when they are released, and I make it to Blockbuster to rent things on a very infrequent basis too. I found Mystery Men in the 2/$11 bin of dvds at Walmart. I figured $5.50 to buy it isn't that much more than $3.99 to rent it, and I've got it forever if I like it.

It was good. I liked it a lot. But I have to qualify that. I was a bit out of my mind when I first started watching it. The intro is very bizarre and I was thinking 'what the hell?' for the first 10 or 15 minutes. Then it started making more sense. And I was getting enthralled by the set design and all the weird combinations of sci-fi and white trash culture. The city was obviously futuristic, but the details were all right out of the Generation X catalog of pop culture icons. The Disco Boys and the Corvette limo were totally awesome. Casanova Frankenstein's castle was perfect with the gothic disco look. If I ever built a castle it would probably look like a gothic disco.

The 'ragtag' team of super-heros was funny. Of course I was particularly intrigued by the Shoveler. I think it would have given the story a lot more opportunity for puns if he had been the Hoer. But, I do realize that a shovel makes a better weapon than a hoe. Hoes are generally peace loving and not violent at all. Hoes just aren't well suited for conflict and fighting. We're lovers, not warriors. I've never heard of anyone getting hoed to death.

I think this movie is vastly under-rated and under-appreciated. I'm glad I bought it because it's like The Big Lebowski in that it gets better each time you see it (I've watched it 3 times so far). Even if the story of the 'little guy' being the hero isn't appealing to someone the look of the movie is worth the time to watch it. It's a real visual treat, as I think movies should be. That's why you watch a movie instead of reading a book, so you can see it.

Hoe Food...

I just ate lunch that included some Fritos which got me thinking about Hoe food. There's an old country favorite called a hoecake. It's a little fried corn cake. Some people call them griddle cakes, not to be confused with pan cakes which are made of wheat flour and not corn flour. I'm not sure how hoecakes got their name except that it must have been one of those country things (must pronounce that as 'thangs'). *

Hostess makes Ho-Hos. They are yummy, as is typical of Hoe food. They are a lot like Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls. But that's just too fancy a name, 'Swiss Cake Rolls'. Don't get me wrong, though, I love Little Debbie cakes. They are made right here in Tennessee, and I even got to tour the bakery when I was a kid. But Ho-Ho is the best name for a delicious chocolate and cream cake roll. Mmm mmm.



And it seems that Keebler has discontinued their Sunshine brand of Hi-Ho Crackers. I like that name too, Hi-Ho. I suspect that the low carb diet craze is responsible for the end of Hi-Ho Crackers. Keebler will probably regret their decision when everyone gets tired of putting their cheese on lettuce leaves or whatever they do now.



Here's a link to a Hoe chip. A company called Yo-Ho Food Products makes them. What a great name for a company, Yo-Ho. I haven't tried these 'Famous Natural Potato Chips'. I'm not sure if they are available around here. I like the packaging.

http://www.taquitos.net/snacks.php?snack_code=601

*I just did a little research and discovered the origin of the hoecake:

Made of corn meal, water and salt, and originally cooked on the flat of a hoe over an open fire, hence the name. Other regional names are Johnnycakes, johnny cakes, jonnycake, ashcake, battercake, corn cake, cornpone, hoecake, hoe cake, journey cake, mush bread, pone, Shawnee cake, jonakin, and jonikin. (from http://www.foodreference.com/html/fhoecake.html)

Ha! See Hoes are cooking utensils too. Can't do that with a Pitch Fork!

Hoedown

Hoedown (noun, Date: 1841) 1 : squaredance 2 : a gathering featuring hoedowns

You know, that's another reason why Pitch Forks are all pissed at Hoes. We got a dance named after us. They didn't. Man, they sure were mad about that. Stupid Pitch Forks. Personally, though, I think that if they were naming the dance after us they should have at least invited us a few times. But, no. We were always left behind.

(I was going to write something really dirty about another way of defining 'hoedown' but I got lost in the visuals.)

Sensitive Hoes

Hoes have feelings too. I'm an emotional Hoe. I admit it. I'm as moody, insecure, and sensitive as a Hoe can be. It's totally true about people bringing down my self esteem when they don't pay any attention to me. I don't like hanging around with nothing to do. I can't stand the idea of being useless like a pitch fork.

Hoes are a tough bunch because we've survived the advent of a lot of modern power tools and equipment. But all of that has made us especially sensitive to the possibility of being put away and forgotten in favor of some shiny new thing.

Sometimes we get a little over-anxious when it's been a while since someone has put their hands on us. Our biggest fear is to be forgotten or discarded. Sometimes we are susceptible to trying too hard or overachieving in the attempt to avoid being disregarded or overlooked. If you see a jittery Hoe it's most likely because someone isn't paying enough attention to him/her.

Sometimes I wish I could be more like Weedeater. He's so loud and obnoxious and oblivious to what others think about him. He just goes about his business as noisy as he can, but he's not trying to get anyone's attention. He just is. And people put up with his bravado because he is usually a good worker. Though I've seen more than one Weedeater get beat pretty hard when his string gets jammed.

Well no, I wouldn't want to be a Weedeater. They don't usually live very long. What I do wish I could develop is a little more of Weedeater's 'devil-may-care' attitude. He just doesn't worry about things like Hoes do.

%@&#!!! Pitch Forks

In case anyone is wondering why Pitch Forks are so bad I guess I should fill you in. It goes way back to an old tool shed feud between the Pitch Fork and Hoe families. And of course it originated with accusations of cheating and illegitimate hybrids. Now, all of this happened long before these kinds of conflicts were played out on Jerry Springer's stage. But if there had been a Jerry Springer back then you can be sure that the old P.F.s and Hoes would have been on there hootin' and hollerin' and dukin' it out to the cheers of an audience of wayward lawn and garden tools. I can't really go into great detail because the feud was finally settled in court and there was a clause that all descendents of each family must not discuss certain details. I know that spoils it for all the voyeurs out there, but I don't really want to get into trouble for running my mouth too much. But let's just say that an old Pitch Fork was living up to his family's heritage.

Let's talk about Pitch Forks in history. They are bad news. They always have been. How do you think the Devil ended up picking a Pitch Fork for his tool of choice? That was a match made in Hell, that's for sure. And how many stories have you heard about some unsuspecting kid jumping into a haystack where a Pitch Fork was hiding? Lots, I know. And the poor kids always ended up impaled by the nasty Pitch Fork. Most of them died because of it. You've never heard any tales about Hoes killing kids like that. It just doesn't happen. Hoes generally stay out of haystacks to begin with. We don't like that texture of straw, and it's really messy too, which brings me to the jobs that Pitch Forks usually do. They really aren't good for much except moving hay around. That's about it. Honestly, and this isn't slander, it's the truth; Pitch Forks just aren't very useful. I think that's the root of their evil. They have such low self esteem about that it makes them mean. We all know that type.

Okay so that's a little background on that whole evil Pitch Fork thing. I'm sure I'll think of some other bad things they've been responsible for over the years, but that's enough for now. Just mark my words. Beware the evil Pitch Forks. They might appear harmless or at least non-threatening, but just remember, Pitch Forks are very dangerous.

Totem Hoe

About three years ago I had a session with a shaman who told me what some of my totems are. My main one is a mouse. Yeah, a lowly little mouse, but it's pretty accurate because mice are detail oriented and like to store things and dig, like a hoe. Mouse medicine is Scrutiny and Analysis which is good and bad. There is such a thing as over-analyzing and picking apart stuff. Oh, I know that all too well. This very blog is an exercise in that. Some of my other totems are hummingbird, butterfly, dragonfly, lizard, and spider. I know there are some others, but I will have to look back at my old notes and see if I wrote all of them down.

Hummingbird medicine is pure joy. They flee from conflict and ugliness, yet they are quite fierce and tough when they need to be. They exist to bring about happiness and help us find joy in all we do. They also teach us how to use flowers for healing. Hummingbirds will die if caged.

Butterfly medicine is transformation. The life cycle of the butterfly goes from egg, to larva (caterpillar), to pupa (chrysalis), to adult. The transformation from that occurs in the chrysalis is such a mystery. How a soft, wormy thing can become a beautiful, winged insect is amazing and representative of the potential change within us all.

Dragonfly medicine is illusion and the power of light. Dragonfly knows that the way in which things reflect and absorb light determines how they are seen. Dragonfly reminds us to remember that we can change how we perceive things, that we can shine the light on our illusions to help us see the truth.

Lizard medicine is subtlety and keenness of perception. Lizard can feel the vibrations and heat of their insect prey as they move. And Lizard's eyesight can detect the slightest movements. Lizard medicine is clairvoyance and the ability to bridge the conscious and subconscious, as in dreaming. Sometimes Lizard is called the Dreamer.

Spider medicine is creativity and the weaving of fate. By spinning its web Spider is creating the Universe and the fate of all who enter that web. Spider is a creator but is also a destroyer. If you are caught in its web when its hungry you might become its next meal. But we have to remember that feeding the creator is just as honorable and important as any other destiny.

Just like a totem pole this totem hoe has many components. We all do. None of us are just simple sticks, well, except maybe pitch forks.

Yo mamma is a pitch fork!

That is this ultimate hoe insult because we all know what pitch forks do.