Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Maintenance

I finally upgraded my template to the "new" blogger. In the process I've cleaned house on some links, removing some non-reciprocated ones and moving some inactive ones to the "resting fields." I should change that to the "Fallow Fields." I couldn't think of the right word this afternoon. Funny how we'll have trouble thinking of something and then a few hours later it will suddenly pop into our minds. If I've overlooked any links please let me know.

At least now I've got a list of labels and a better archive. And waiting a while to upgrade templates was probably a good idea because now it is so much easier than it was when blogger first switched. A lot of people must have complained about it.

I'm still trying to decide what picture to put in the header. I think I'll give the lynx spider eating the wasp a break. Any suggestions? What would you like to see there?

Alien Tomatoes





We have three store-bought tomatoes that are freaking me out. I noticed that they were getting these weird bumps on them, as seen in the first picture. Well, being the curious thing I am I decided to cut one in half to see what was making the bumps. I figured that they might be some kind of fruit fly maggots or something like that. As you can see the tomato is not very over-ripe or anywhere close to rotten. It would still be just fine to eat if it didn't have those strange growths.

In the second picture it looks like worms are growing out of the flesh. It's not worms. It's the seeds sprouting while still inside the tomato.

I have never in my life seen anything like it. And neither has my dad who has grown tomatoes all his life. I'm guessing these are some genetically altered tomatoes that have evolved into self-propagating fruits. While I'm very freaked out and too suspicious of them to eat them I can see how it might be evolutionarily advantageous for a tomato to be able to grow like this. Or maybe they are alien body snatcher tomatoes? Either way I've left it outside to see if the sprouts are going to continue growing and feeding off the "parent" tomato.

Please, if anyone knows anything about this leave me a comment. Thanks!

(And I hope I haven't inadvertently exposed some government secret. Or maybe this is some kind of omen?) ;-)

Friday, May 25, 2007

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I Can Do It!




I'm no Joanne Liebler or any of those other home improvement mascu-women who like to build houses or do other heavy construction, but I do my fair share (and probably more) of the maintenance around the house. I begrudgingly do some of it, like installing a new two-line phone jack to replace the one that was destroyed when the husband got mad and ripped the phone off the wall. Now, I'm not married to a violent man. I wouldn't marry one of those. But he is human and in the course of our marriage he has had a handfull of incidents where he destroyed some object out of anger and frustration. (I don't think I've ever actually done it, but I sure have wanted to at times. ;-) )

The phone in the laundry room was the one I used most because it was convenient since I'm in the laundry room so much anyway. And also it is near the kitchen where I also am often working. I don't even know why he got mad at the phone or whoever he was talking to because it happened many months ago and I forgot the details. He even got me a new phone for my birthday, way back in January. Well, it sat on the bar for months and months. (I don't nag anymore because it's a waste of energy.) And because the most convenient phone wasn't there anymore many times the phone never got answered before the machine picked up.

Well, yesterday I finally decided that I'd try to install the new jack myself. Here are the empty hole and bare wires:



If it was only a one-line jack that would be very straight-forward, but no, we have to have a two-line phone for business purposes. And it would be really nice if there was a very uniform coloring of the wires, but no, they have to make them all different so that the blue wires on the jack don't have matching blue wires in the phone lines, and so on. So I had to go to the box outside where the wires come into the house to see what colors the lines were and then figure out which ones corresponded on the jack. It didn't help that the only multiline jack at the store was a three-line jack. Well, it took me about an hour to do what it would have taken the husband about 15 minutes to do because of my inexperience with this obscure wire matching procedure. Here is the properly installed jack:



I have to confess that the entire time I was struggling with this man's work I was cursing men and feminism for putting me in the position of having to do a man's job. Is it not enough that I do all the laundry and other housework, as well as much of the outside work? And now I'm expected to install a phone jack too? How much money do men get paid for doing this job all day long? And here I am having to figure it out for free and take time away from my regular jobs to do it. Grumble, grumble, grumble. Man, I'm gonna see how long it takes for the man to even notice I did his job. I'm gonna make him feel guilty for this, or maybe even cut him off for a few days... Grumble, grumble, blah, blah, blah.

I had convinced myself that I would not feel accomplished for doing this thing and that it would be just as satisfying, or more so, if he had done it for me himself. Here is the phone completely installed and working:



So what happened when he got home from work? Did I make him feel guilty for not installing the jack and my birthday present from months ago? Well, of course not. I'm such a wuss. When he came in I felt myself grinning from ear to ear and heard myself ask, "Did you see what I did?!"

He looked bewildered and when I pointed at the phone he smiled with surprise and said, "You did that all by yourself?" (He knew I could all along, of course, and just wanted me to learn how to do it.) And I told him all about how long it took and how I grumbled through the whole process and how yes, I do feel accomplished about it even though I didn't want to do it and feel accomplished about it.

So, Rosie Rivetter, here's to you and doing what we women don't necessarily want to do but sometimes have to.

Friday, May 18, 2007

On the Road Again

This afternoon I'll be leaving for a nice little weekend getaway to visit some friends out-of-state. Of course, I'm happy to get to drive the Corvette for more than just a few miles. And it will be nice to be "kid-free" for the weekend. Mommas need little vacations too. :-) Everyone have a nice weekend!

Thursday, May 17, 2007

THC In the News

I suppose by now everyone has heard about the Happy Meal incident. The parents are apparently considering suing McDonalds over it. I think that's just stupid and opportunistic if they do. The offender was arrested and fired which should be enough.

And then there's the police brownie overdose incident. On the 911 call he says he thinks they are dead because "time is going by really, really, really slow..." LOL, well, I've heard that those brownies are pretty potent like that. ;-)

Prostitute Killed In Hoe Attack

(via Tayster)


Wow, the world really must be about to end. A hoe has been implicated in the murder of a transvestite prostitute in California.

I have to say that hoes are just not well-suited for violence and especially not murder. What a mess it must have been! Yuck!

I think that hoe must have been part pitch fork or something. Most hoes are quite peaceful and kind. This is such shocking news.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Rest In Peace: Jerry Falwell

Jerry Falwell was Raptured yesterday. He was found collapsed in his office at Liberty University. Despite his somewhat controversial views, which weren't really all that controversial except to the media, he was a fine Christian leader who generally wasn't afraid to speak his Christian Truth even if it wasn't popular or welcome. I can't include myself as a follower of Falwell's very Fundamentalist views, but I can respect the strength of his faith and his willingness to live the Life he preached. (unlike the AntiChrist)

My personal connection to Falwell is that David's cousin graduated from Liberty and became a minister. He officiated our wedding almost sixteen years ago. It was his first wedding he ever performed. I sometimes wonder how many he has done since then and how many have withstood the test of time. Maybe I have created a sense of pressure to succeed on his behalf so that he can claim some kind of efficacy. ;-) To his credit, I must say that his premarital counseling was very effective, and I will always remember and agree with his statement that love ultimately does not keep a marriage together but that commitment does. After all, what do we think is the purpose of vows? Faith and faithfulness are not easy, and so we must make special promises (commitments) to God and each other that we will honor our agreements despite whatever circumstances arise ("for better or worse" and so on). Well, that's the ideal anyway.

I've dedicated a song, Mindy Smith's "Come to Jesus", to Falwell. My sympathy to his family and friends, but I know that although they will miss his earthly presence they know he is where he most wanted to be.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Happy Mother's Day



I'd like to wish a very happy Mother's Day to everyone, not just the mothers. I've had friends who didn't like their mothers for various reasons. Some women just aren't really good mothers, and some children aren't very good either. It balances out somewhere down the line.

Regardless, try to appreciate the woman that gave you life even if she hasn't always met your expectations. And mothers, do appreciate the children you've been assigned to teach how to be good human beings.

We mothers learn so much from our children if we pay attention to them.

For those whose mothers are gone, like mine, take this day to meditate on how your mother influenced your growth. We are allowed to miss our mothers. There is no shame in it. Taking one day a year to mourn is okay.

Happy Mother's Day everyone!

Sunday, May 06, 2007

05-06-07

I just wanted to do a post with that date. And also at 2:34 pm.

Happy Sunday after Cinco de fucking Mayo. Sorry to any Mexican readers, but I think it's pretty much an empty celebration for most people. Not that having parties and drinking beer is a bad thing, but who needs to make up a reason for it? ;-)

A little Hellfire and Brimstone has been brewing in the sermonette kettle, but it's not quite ready yet. Sometimes those things take a while to get good and ready to serve. ;-) I'll let you know when it's time...

Friday, May 04, 2007

Two Years

Wow, I've been a blogging hoe for two years now. With just under 700 posts in all, that is a lot of blather and fun. Is it an anniversary or a birthday? I don't know, and I guess it doesn't really matter anyway. Not that anyone's gonna buy me a cake or any other token of congratulations. I almost forgot it myself since I've been so busy this week with three school fieldtrips on top of all the other usual stuff.

Well, I haven't been a very good blogger lately, and my little blog isn't really very important in the grand scheme of things. But I never started blogging to become famous or infamous or whatever. It has mainly been for my own entertainment and a "creative" outlet. I'm happy that a few other people have enjoyed it as well. Thanks so much to the few who actually read it! ;-) And even more thanks to those even fewer who actually comment!! :-)

(According to my statcounter, only about 15% of hits are returning visitors while the others are mostly Googlers. Those numbers don't include readers who use feed-readers - like Bloglines, Google Reader, etc. - instead of visiting the actual blog, and I really don't know if there are any of that variety in the first place.)


A gift from Nature: the water irises I "planted" last year are blooming now.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Happy May First

Last year I ranted about the communist takeover of perfectly good fertility celebrations featuring large May Pole phallic symbols.

This year I'll post a picture of my little hummingbird friend that has returned again this year.



Today my fifth grader's class had a field trip. On Thursday and Friday my other two have field trips. My mom never went on field trips with my classes when I was in school. We didn't go on very many field trips back then anyway, but those feminist "working" mothers couldn't take days off from their jobs to be "school" mothers on the rare occasions. Not that I'm scarred from that experience. I'm not. But I sure am thankful that I don't have to go to some office full of catty women every day and have to miss out on some of my kids' education. And it's nice to get to meet and talk with other mothers like myself who make mothering their primary job. Sorry, I mean no offense to women who work by choice or circumstance, but for my family I am willing to "sacrifice" extra money, nice clothes, and whatever other "benefits" come from outside employment.

And finally Spring has come to stay. Happy May!