I might be going supernova right now, like all this past week, I've been on absolute fire. Mostly good but sometimes a little embarrassing too. I think maybe these are menopausal hot flashes, but they're not entirely unpleasant except when they have interfered with my ability to fully perceive. Thinking back at moments I wish I had been less distracted by trying not to spontaneously combust. There are details I wish I had been able to commit to memory. The burning internal heat just consumed too much of my awareness so that I feel like I missed some important points. But some moments did embed into my mind like sparks - brilliant flashes of something that feels really nice.
"Lovely is the feelin' now, fever, temperatures risin' now, power (oh power) is the force,"
Add that we got a big boost of vindication in the political realm. Maybe the solar maximum is helping raise that energy level as well.
I'm trying to remain grounded amidst all these currents on multiple wavelengths, ebb and flow of a stimulated ocean along with a wildfire stirred by high winds. My senses are in the process of being reset to account for all this influx of new energy. I'm trying to find my thresholds of perception and boundaries of reality. Things have shifted and sometimes I feel little overwhelmed but in that ecstatic hyper-stimulated way. But then sometimes I swing the other direction towards despair at the thought that I've completely misread everything and nothing is as I've felt and thought. Ridiculous delights, dramas, and dilemmas all played out in my head and making me feel real feelings but to what consequence? Ultimately I keep reminding myself to appreciate feeling good whether it originates internally or is aroused by an external source.
Despite to occasional discomfort I am enjoying this big hot energy. It makes me feel so alive and energized. I hope it doesn't wane any time soon.
"Keep on, with the force, don't stop, don't stop 'til you get enough"
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